Here's the real FAQ (free jokes for all!):
What is Prime?
Prime is the new Insync license, replacing Plus/Pro/Business and thus complicating things even though we simplified it.
Prime is not...
* making any difference between home or professional users
* free, not it every will be, you’ll pay up (yes, again)
* obligated, you can still stay on an old version. Well, until we stop supporting it I guess
* diverse, it’s the only option for new customers and currently there’s no option for existing customers
Traditional desktop software is generally sold as a one-time purchase between major versions with a discounted upgrade between versions. Even though we made you think we’re different, we’re just like any other company.
Current customers have the option to stay on their current license or pay again.
How much is Prime?
For new customers? Easy, it’s $29.99 per Google account with a 30-day money back guarantee. There are volume discounts for multiple licenses.
For loyal current customers? Ouch, that’s a tough one. Depends how much you already spent on our software, about 40 to 50 bucks in total I guess.
But hey! You can buy like 100 accounts and it’ll be cheaper (per account) and you’ll have many thankful friends. That’s priceless!
When will Prime be available?
If you’re a new user, right now! Old and loyal? Sorry, you’ll have to wait.
What is the difference between Plus/Pro/Business and Prime?
Plus vs Prime
+ Something with versions… We don’t really care.
+ You’ll pay more, that’s all I remember from the memo.
Pro vs Prime
+ It’ll be cheaper!
Business vs Prime
+ It’s tax deductible, why on earth would you care?
All customers on Plus/Pro/Business have been grandaddied, whatever that means.
How do I check what license I have?
Find the confirmation mail we sent you. What do you mean, you can’t find it anymore?!
What was the original promo email about, the one that went to spam for some customers?
We don’t really remember, can anyone send us a copy? Our spam folder already got deleted. It went to spam because it basically was spam, we offered something for free that isn’t really free and that’s pretty much the definition of spam. No, once again, you will not be getting Prime for free, stop asking! If we did free upgrades to all our existing customers, we couldn’t afford a second company Porche for all employees. Yeah sure, we passed out some free accounts back in May but that was only for three days. Boy, that sure was the craziest start of the week ever, I can tell you that.
What do I need to do to continue using Insync? Do I need to upgrade to Prime?
We don’t really know. For our sake, just take the damn upgrade and leave us alone already. Think about the time you got Windows XP, probably the best operating system evah and then Microsoft ended its life and forced everyone to upgrade. This is the same thing… Or is it? What were we talking about?
What happens if I don’t upgrade to Prime from my current license?
Didn’t I just explain that? Seriously, stay with me.
Will Insync 1.x (the version we’re on now) become obsolete when the next version update (2.x) is released?
If I upgrade to Prime, will I need to pay again for future major version upgrades?
No. Unless we pull a stunt like this again, then yes. But no, we don’t think we will. Larry! Will we ever “simplify” our price points again? What’s that? Maybe in about 5 years? So I can tell them no, right? Right. No.
How and when can I upgrade to Prime?
We’re currently test driving some new Porches, we’ll send you a form or something, you’ll hear from us. Note: for Business, our people will talk to your people.
How will the upgrade work?
• Vroom vrooooom vroom vroom vroOoOoOooOm
• VROOM vroom vroom vroom vroooooom vroom vroom
• Honk honk! VroOoOoOOooOOooOOoom vroom vroom VROOM vroom vroom…
Is Prime a bait-and-switch or some other pricing scam?
Hahahahaha, hahaha, I don’t see why you would think that. Hahaha… No*, of course not*. What do you mean? I don’t see any asterisk. You silly bugger, haha. Buy Prime now!
.* it may be, we haven’t decided on that yet.